Team Fearless on Integrity

Recently I have written several pieces on integrity.  Today, this pops up on my YouTube home page.  From Team Fearless.

I'm not really big on motivational talks and whatnot.  So many of them include an element of hucksterism.  The real estate business is full of motivational hucksterism.  And many brokers eat it up.  The irony.

But I think this would be great for adolescents.
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Honour

The Sublime Keeley Hawes

I have been a huge fan of Keeley Hawes since The Durrells in Corfu.  In this performance, I think she proves that she is one of the finest actors working today.  The Guardian's Chitra Ramaswamy calls Hawes' performance a study in controlled anguish.  But she only gave the movie four out of five stars.  That may well be correct, but Hawes' performance is sublime.

Highly recommended.  Find it on Britbox, Amazon, or Apple TV.

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First They Came for the Christians

First they came for the Christians

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a Christian

Then they came for the economists and the historians

And I did not speak out

Because I was not an economist or a historian

Then they came for the police officers

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a police officer

Then they came for the Trump voters

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a Trump voter

Then they came for the gun owners

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a gun owner

Then they came for the small business types

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a small business type

Then they came for the Israelis

And I did not speak out

Because I was not an Israeli

Then they came for the West

The Western canon, classical music, the Old Masters,

the Founding Fathers, the Constitution, 

Adam Smith, Alexis de Tocqueville, Winston Churchill,

And the best that Western Civilization has

Bequeathed to us all

Then they came for the independent thinkers

And those who veered off narrative:

Roseanne Barr, Gina Carano, Bari Weiss,

Ayaan Hirsi Ali, Dave Rubin, James Damore,

Bret Weinstein, Karlyn Borysenko, Jodi Shaw,

J.K. Rowling, Maajid Nawaz, Roger Scruton,

Many others

Then they came for the First Amendment

And there was no one left to defend it

Then they came for me

And there was no one left

To speak out for me

Apologies to Martin Niemöller

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The White Pebble

Who do you want to be?

*** Click if not crisp ***

From the brilliant Hugh MacLeod.

I'm not religious at all.  In fact, I'm an atheist and an anti-theist.  But what does it matter?  MacLeod's question is:  Who are you, really?  I might change it to:  Who do you want to be?

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I posted this here about a year ago, but I was thinking of it this week.  So I wanted to repost it.  I have been giving a lot of thought to integrity.  Not just professional integrity, but more generally, living a high integrity life.  And being honest with ourselves and others.

There's been a lot of discussion of emotional intelligence since Daniel Goleman's 1995 book, Emotional Intelligence, appeared.  But there is less discussion on emotional integrity.  If you run this Google search, you'll find lots of mushy, feel-good, self-help type articles.  I can't say that I found any of them very helpful.

I did find this definition:

Emotional integrity is the courage to acknowledge one’s true feelings, wants and desires without judging them with the societal lens.  In essence, it is about being 100% honest with oneself.  If one is just emotionally intelligent without being emotionally honest, the benefit will at best be temporary and skin deep.

I find the idea of emotional integrity appealing.  But I'm not really happy with this definition.  My concern is that this can be selfish, right?  If we are honest, yes of course, feelings, wants, and desires can be selfish.  But actions need not be.  It seems to me that acknowledging selfishness should be part of the process.

We all have selfish desires now and again.  Of course we do.  But while we can and should acknowledge these, I don't think mere acknowledgement is the only thing that matters.  It is not enough.  What matters more is how we comport ourselves in the face of our own desires.  While some of us can transcend selfishness, most of us are less saintly, and have to act appropriately in spite of it.  That takes real integrity.

It is worth remembering that it is not only our own well-being or fulfillment or even happiness that matters.  Yes, we want and deserve these qualities.  But at what cost?  Integrity demands that we consider others and the consequences of our actions.

But I do like his courage to acknowledge line.

So let me take a stab at my own definition:

Emotional Integrity:  The courage to acknowledge one’s true feelings, wants, and desires, to ourselves and to others, and not being afraid to act unselfishly on those emotions.  Even if misunderstood or not shared or not reciprocated by others.

That is a pretty high standard.

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On Integrity

For the last twenty years I have worked in the real estate business.  It is a business with a well deserved reputation for low integrity.  The way I have dealt with this is that, from the beginning, I set a zero tolerance policy for dishonesty or any type of low integrity behavior.  I could not and cannot control what other brokers do.  And I certainly have no control over Realtor organizational policy.  But I can control my behavior and of the conduct of the brokers working for me.  That's not quite right.  I do not control their conduct.  Rather, I am very choosy about who works with me.  This policy has served us well.

When Covid struck in early 2020, I spent the first months of the crisis completing a long-planned book on competence and integrity in the real estate business.  And why these qualities are so rare in this business.  Clearly, this is a subject dear to my heart.  But as the pandemic stretched on through 2020, I had to find something other than real estate to pay the bills.

The path of least resistance led me to Amazon.  I have long admired the company as a customer and more recently as a writer.  It seemed like an ideal solution for me.  And I talked about their hiring process here; it is ridiculously easy to get a job there.  So off I went, hoping to ride out the storm.

But after working at Amazon for only a few weeks, imagine my surprise when I discover that the company's managers have no more integrity than your typical real estate broker.  My surprise and my disappointment.  Because while I can choose who surrounds me in the real estate business, there was very little I could do about it at Amazon.

Perhaps if I had come from some other field, I would have been more accepting of the managerial deficiencies.  I know you find this everywhere.  But I have spent twenty years making damn sure that our firm operates with the highest possible level of integrity.

At this point, I just cannot tolerate anything less.

I couldn't do it.

One final point.  We encounter low integrity brokers all the time.  I have learned that it is a waste of time to try to reason with them.  You are certainly not going to change them.  And it is not your job to do so.  You can't and won't make them better people.  Also, don't explain yourself.  Explaining high integrity decisions and actions to a low integrity individual is a complete waste of time.  But there is good news:  I assure you, high integrity plus smart always trumps low integrity.  Always.  Because low integrity is never smart.  I have never run across a low integrity individual who is especially clever.  They are never as smart as they think they are.  The best you can do is first act how you think best, and then remove yourself from their environment.

There you have it:  Life lessons from a low integrity business.

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The Most Courageous Person Alive

Ayaan Hirsi Ali

Ayaan Hirsi Ali is the most courageous person living in the world today.

If you don't know her story, you should Google her.  In 2004, she wrote the text for the short film Submission.  The film's director, Theo van Gogh, was murdered several days after its release.  His assassin left a letter threatening Hirsi Ali pinned with a knife to the dead van Gogh.  You can't make this stuff up.

And yet, Hirsi Ali has continued to write about and speak out about Islam.  Here she sits down with Dave Rubin.

It is rather refreshing to go from writing about the low integrity experience of working at Amazon to sharing this video of the person who is setting the global standard for high integrity today.  If you like this video, here she is talking with Bari Weiss.  Here she is with Ben Shapiro.  All three of these conversations are worth your time.

Hirsi Ali has a new book out, Prey:  Immigration, Islam, and the Erosion of Women's Rights.

Let me quote from the book's Amazon page:

Why are so few people talking about the eruption of sexual violence and harassment in Europe’s cities?  No one in a position of power wants to admit that the problem is linked to the arrival of several million migrants — most of them young men — from Muslim-majority countries.

I have read all of her other work.  Just ordered this one.  She is one of those people who make you ask:  My God, what am I doing with myself?  What have I contributed?

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Leaving the Chocolate Factory

Chased Off

I wrote back in January about going to work in an Amazon fulfillment center.  I have been sort of languishing in the role for a while.  Tonight was my last shift.

My managers liked me well enough; they certainly liked my work ethic.  But I’m not sure they knew what to do with me.  Plus in retrospect, I think I was a bit too observant for their tastes.

One night our Area Manager (the boss) asks me what the problem is.  I had been rather cool towards him for a couple of weeks.  I mean I worked hard, I did my job, but I’d pretty much nod and get on with it.

He noticed:  “Okay, what’s going on?”

“Not to worry Chase, I’m leaving.”

“Really?  Why is that?”

“Well, I feel manipulated.”

I saw it in his expression, he knew exactly what I meant.  See, he had given me a highly unusual year end bonus.  Tiny.  So small that it could only be seen as a symbolic gesture.  He did not even call it a bonus; he called it a thank you.  But it worked.  I felt like my hard work was appreciated.

A week later, he asked a few people to apply for promotion.  I was not among them.

Complete mea culpa.  “You’re absolutely right, I meant to ask you.  But then I was out for two weeks.”

I never learned why.

“I’ll fix it.”

By this point, I did not know if he could be trusted.  And as I mentioned in my original piece, I had noticed some things about how the department was run that made me wonder.

A couple of days went by.  Then, low and behold, he moves me.

“I want you to do this a couple of nights a week and water spider a couple of nights.”

Water spider is the Amazon term for the guy who delivers unmade boxes and other supplies to the packers.  I had been doing this job practically since I started.  It's easily the worst job in the building, but I never complained.  I worked my ass off and he knew it.

“Great.”

So he moves me to the label printers.  Ten industrial printers that print the address labels for the now packed boxes and envelopes.  They are pretty amazing:  The boxes and envelopes are of all different shapes and sizes, and these machines apply the labels to them while they are moving.  They need quite a bit of tending.

It’s not that it is a step up.  But to get ahead at Amazon, you need to have exposure to as many different roles as possible.  A few days later, he moves me again, to the main sort router, keeping product inventory flowing to the packers.

His Process Assistant, T.J., tells me:  “We are moving you to vital roles that keep the business running.”  So for the first time in over a month, I actually felt good about what I was doing.  But it was fleeting because I spent less than one full shift in each of these roles.  Evidently Chase did not believe me when I told him I was leaving.  Or more likely, didn't care.  I don't think he had any intention of moving me.  This was just further manipulation.

And hey I understand, a good box guy is almost impossible to find!  Seriously, for a few bucks and a few insincere promises, he got the hardest working water spider he could imagine for, well, as long as he could sucker me into staying.  I guess he thought that was a pretty good trade-off.  But I can only allow myself to be played for so long.

Twenty years in the real estate business and thirty years as an entrepreneur have taught me to be a pretty decent judge of character.  The guy's a bit shady, and I just don't want to work for someone I cannot trust.  I'll happily do the least desirable job.  And do it well.  But don't lie to me.  I gave Chase every opportunity to prove me wrong.  But once I was convinced of his inherent dishonesty, I left.

I am rather glum about it.  I loved the idea of working for Amazon.  The actual experience...not so much.

Oompa Loompa doompedee doo...

I need some boxes...I’m looking for you.

Oompa Loompa doompedee dee...

I’ll find a dupe who will fetch them for me!

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Kurt Vonnegut: Long Walk to Forever

Charles Haines reads my favorite short story...

Long Walk to Forever

Kurt Vonnegut

1960

If you prefer to read this lovely piece, find it here.  It's a quick read, about four pages long.  There are a number of film adaptions.  You can find most of them on YouTube.  But personally I don't think any of them are any good.  The production values, casting, and acting just don't live up to the quality of the text.

It is interesting to note that Vonnegut himself did not much care for this story.  It is certainly an atypical piece for him.  He thought it sickeningly sweet.  And to be fair, I guess it is.  But I have always found it quite moving.

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