How to Deal with Difficult People

Rule:  People who are difficult to talk with are almost always not worth the effort.

I was raised to believe that we should be nice to everyone.  I was later educated to believe that we can learn something from everyone.  I guess if you put these together what you get is that everyone has something useful and interesting inside them, and even if it is difficult, we should tease it out.  We should give everyone the opportunity to demonstrate their inner worthiness.  Think about the crusty academic who never really mastered social skills, but is brilliant in his field.

Do those people exist?  Absolutely.  I have met plenty of people like this, and yes, learned something from them.

But at some point I realized that never really mastered social skills was not some benign little flaw.  The sort of shortcoming that should be overlooked because of their brilliance.  If they have not mastered basic social skills it is because they do not care about basic social skills.  And that almost always means they do not care about...you.

And of course, that is absolutely fine if they are Albert Einstein.  But what if they're not?  What if they are some mediocre academic?  Or your roommate?  Your neighbor?  I mean, how many people are Albert Einstein?  If you live next to Steve Jobs, and he's a jerk, it's understandable, even forgivable.  But if you live next to Fred Smith?  That is something altogether different.  And let's be honest, most of us are Fred Smith.

So if someone is difficult to talk with, you have a cost-benefit analysis to run in your head.  Ask yourself, what are the odds that this person is worth the effort to overcome his or her rudeness to discover their inner light?  If you are the generous type, you might also ask yourself, what are the odds that this brilliant (or charming) person is just having a bad day?  Because of course we all do on occasion.

So will you sometimes answer the question incorrectly?  No doubt.  Sometimes you will ignore a rude brilliant person.  And hopefully less often, you will engage with a rude mediocre person.

We only have so much time.  Personally, I'd rather risk making the first error.

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Memo to Conservatives

Banana Republic Rules

Just yesterday, the sitting US president approved, and probably ordered, a raid on the home of the immediate past US president, who importantly also happens to be a contender to unseat that same sitting president.  Got that?  When did the US become Paraguay?

On the pretext of looking for classified documents, this was obviously a fishing expedition designed to intimidate Trump, and others.  I mean dear reader, what would they find if they pulled fifteen boxes of documents out of your house?  There'd be something.  What if we could pull fifteen boxes of documents out of the Clinton's house?  And they forced Trump's attorneys to leave.  Why?  So how can we ever be certain the political thugs that we call the FBI did not plant evidence?  How sad it is that, in the past few years, the FBI has tossed its once sterling reputation.

For many years, I have advised residents of blue cities across the US to flee.  This was, and is, the only rational course of action for those residents.  Take your family, your business, your vote, your taxes, even your mere presence, and go somewhere else.  But when the Democrat machine takes over the country, to where is one supposed to flee?

It seems to me that the current situation in the US leads to one of two possibilities.  First, conservatives can submit to lefty rule.  Let's call this the European path.  We will not like it, but it does offer a more leisurely lifestyle.  After all, why work hard for other people, other people's families, and the government power elite?  Sit back and relax.  Retire early, find a hobby.  Take up needlepoint.  Maybe stock up on a few necessities.

Of course, like our European friends, you'll have less children because you cannot afford them.  You'll pay seven dollars a gallon for gasoline, if you are even able to afford a vehicle.  Our open-border country will be swarming with illegal aliens.  Taxes will be confiscatory.  Climate change will become a continuous emergency giving government types every excuse they need to do anything they want.  Oh, and you might want to brush up on modern pronoun usage.

Sound familiar?  Yes of course, this is the default path we are currently on.

But the other path is even less appealing.  It involves fighting for our values.  Here, I do not mean a political fight within our system.  Our system is broken.  Now let's stop for a moment:  How do I know this for sure?  Because the left does not fear the precedent they just set.  Stop and think about that.  Would they take this reckless action if they had any fear that it could, in turn, be used against them?  No, they will never allow, could never allow, a raid on the homes of the Clinton's or the Biden's.

In any case the left is immune to consequences.  After the Hunter Biden laptop farce, and Hillary Clinton's numerous shenanigans, they know a complicit press makes them immune to any consequences for any malfeasance.  Further, they have politicized all agencies of the federal government to do their bidding.  At this point their impunity is comical, but at the same time vital for their continued hold on power.

I think we should carefully consider what it means for them not to fear the precedent.  It means they fully intend to remain in power.  Indefinitely and regardless of what it takes to do so.  They will lie, cheat, and steal.  They will intimidate.  They will raid their opponents homes and offices.  How long before they shut down television networks and political websites?  I mean, that Tucker Carlson and all his disinformation.  Ultimately they will be arresting their political opponents like all self-respecting banana republics.

So what does fighting for our values look like?  Can we not use our constitutional framework to constrain our burgeoning banana republic?  Well, all banana republics have constitutions.  And all banana republics ignore their respective constitutions.  Antonin Scalia reminded us that a constitution is a mere parchment guarantee, easily ignored, especially with single-party rule.  When there is concentration of power in one person or in one party, Scalia says...when that happens, the game is over.  He was referring to the constitutional process.

So here's the real question:  Is our constitutional process over?  You must decide for yourself.  Many good conservatives will argue that of course, it's not over.  The conservative tendency is to follow and fulfill our constitutional mandates.  The problem with this thinking is that it does not appreciate how much animosity there is for the Constitution on the left.  Obama called it a charter of negative liberties.  They hate the constraints it places on government.  And you know, of course, without such constraints, the left could use government to usher in a new utopia.  So, many left-of-center types would be thrilled to scrap it.  You've heard the arguments:  Replace it with a modern, living constitution.  What they really want is a constitution more malleable to their ever-changing whims.

Whims masquerading as policy goals.  But don't make the mistake of assuming that the left cares about policy.  They only care about policy insofar as it helps them achieve and maintain power.  Good policy is not the goal; power is the goal.  Lofty-sounding policy is only a tool.  If they make a policy mess, so be it.  Look at healthcare, look at the economy, look at immigration, look at our foreign policy.  So what the left really wants is a constitution that helps them achieve and maintain power.  A constitution that allows them to do as they please.  Short of this, the left is more than happy to simply ignore the current Constitution.

Here's my point:  The conservative tendency to adhere to a constitution that the left ignores has led us to where we are today.  If the left is in charge of both the executive and the legislative branches of our government, and has fully politicized the Department of Justice, and is willing to use armed government agents as political operatives, all the while provided cover by a complicit press, and if they are willing to simply ignore the Constitution, then yes, the constitutional process is over.

Ignoring the constitution is the hallmark of a banana republic...

All this to ask conservatives this question:  In a banana republic, what is the process for transfer of power?  Because that is how we will have to fight for our values.  That is the only other path.

We must deploy Banana Republic Rules.

Fans of John Le Carré will recognize the terminology.  In his 1979 classic, Smiley's People, Moscow Rules refer to tactics to be deployed in the most dangerous theaters.  Here, I simply mean that if your opponent is the government of a banana republic, you have to fight with a different set of rules.

I'll let the reader define these for himself, but clearly they are necessarily extraconstitutional.

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